I've been trying to keep up with blogging, but I am getting so so busy lately! November is not our month so far, and we have been filled with a bunch of hardships. I'm definitely hoping that December will be a better month, especially because of my Birthday, & Christmas. I am so so so excited for Tyler's first Christmas, I'm hoping it will be amazing! Tyler is getting so big it's almost unbelievable. I don't know where the time has gone, he's becoming such a big (little) boy! Lately I have been realizing that I want a big family because I grew up basically on my own, and I love the idea of having a big family because then your children are never lonely. Of course, it does come with it's own downsides such as being able to make sure you spend enough quality time with each child but in the end I definitely think it's worth it. (Does anyone think I over use the word definitely?) I would absolutely love to have more children because now that I do think about it, as much as i hated being pregnant, I look back on it and it's a completely wonderful thing. I've decided to wait on College/University for awhile until I can become absolutely sure what I want to do, but I am looking into upgrading some of my high school classes through correspondence so that in the end, I can pick a career based on what I truly want instead of what my current grades are just allowing me to do. In the end, I think that will benefit us more as a family. Ryan is now working 6 days a week, and thinking of getting a 2nd job for right now so that we are able to have more money & put away money for savings in case something comes up unexpectedly. Of course, he is extremely amazing by even thinking of doing that but it's sad to just think of him working constantly. Ryan has to be the most kind hearted person I have ever met, and I am so so thankful to have him in my life. Our 15 month "anniversary" is coming up tomorrow and even though Ryan is working I am glad to be able to look back and see that we have overcome everything that has been thrown our way. We are doing really good, and I believe our relationship is better then it has ever been yet and I'm sure that has to do with everything we have been through together, and everything we are continuing to go through. We are both growing up, and still maturing and I do think that having Tyler in the picture is actually helping a lot. We are learning more what we do and what we do not like, and learning more how to handle stress especially with each other. Our relationship is just doing so well & I am very happy about that. I've started speaking to my biological dad a lot more often and I am beginning to build a friendship with him which is really good because it is something I have lacked in my past. I'm hoping that sometime in the near future, him and I will be close and I will get to have the father daughter relationship I have been missing my entire life. In case anyone doesn't know, I have never met my father and up until these past few months I had never even talked to him in my life so this is kind of a big deal for me! On another note, I'm still struggling a lot with my post-pregnancy weight, and it has really lowered my self-esteem. I've tried to diet, and slow down my eating but when I think about it I get really upset and just end up eating more. We applied for a credit card to see if we would get approved so I could sign up for weight-watchers online but it didn't work out unfortunately so I am just waiting to see what else there is we can do. I give myself credit, because I lost about 45lbs after I had Tyler but I am just stuck where I don't wanna be. I am hoping by this summer, I will at least be at where I was before I had Tyler and I can continue working down to my goal weight. If anyone has any suggestions, or diet plans for me feel free to comment or tweet me (@amandaamcmillan)
Anyway, I must get back to cooking dinner. (Shepherds Pie, MMM)
Bye all!
